i've been saying it for years. but all my rants fall on deaf ears. "please mr. wyatt sell me some suspenders to hold up my britches!" yeah thats right, wouldn't it be cool to be the first one on your block with some "those poor bastards" suspenders! come on, think about it. all those pretty women down at the morgue, they can't resist a fella in suspenders. suspenders can also help a mans posture. hell i know of at least three hunch back bastard fans, and i'm not even alllowed outside the fence. well except for on Krull's birthday when they let me out to worship, but what if i went to stand up from kneeling at the alter and my pants fell down in front of my god? now thats embarissing!
somebody take our damn money! we want to buy more trinkits and such, so we can impress the drunk indians down at the dump. and im personally tired of strangers seeing my balls cause i can't keep my britches tawght.